Redeem your 
Dear Ms. Netiquette,
About six months ago a newly acquainted Pogo Friend and I were in a Passing Room for Everyone Wins Bingo. As always a verbal battle started between the Passers and the B/O’ers (Blackout’ers). I had established a pattern of saying “vnp so&so and gg top 5 & nja” which I thought was appropriate since vnp, or “very nice passing”, acknowledged the player who had passed the most cones. And “gg”, or “good going” to the top 5 for being recognized by Pogo for a game achievement and of course “nja”, or “nice job all” for reaching the team goal.
They all seemed like benign comments to me. But on that particular day someone in the room on the Passers side said, “And there goes Switzerland” and someone on the B/O’er side agreed! My reply was “Okay, at least I got both sides to agree on something.”
But it didn’t end there, one player on the passers side continued saying that I was egging them on and giving them the green light by saying gg top 5 since the Highest Score Players are assumed to be the B/O’er’s, which I didn’t agree as being true,but this player went on and on till I just left the room.
Now the other part of the story, about a week later my new Pogo Friend and EWB buddy told me she had received a chain letter in her Pogo mail that told people not to put me on their friends list because I would hack their account. I ask her to forward me the letter but she said she had deleted it.
She then blocked me as a friend. It hurt me but then I told myself okay this is just one person and actually not someone I “really” knew nor apparently did she know me. I also thought her story was more Urban Pogo Myth than truth. But guess what? I received a chain mail letter in my Pogo Messages this week with the exact same thing about another Pogo Player. It was about a person that I didn’t know and was forwarded to me by a player I didn’t know. I forwarded the letter to Pogo by reporting it as “Harassment or Stalking” seemed the only viable category offered since someone was Harassing the player in the spam letter.
But you can’t unsend that letter nor can you erase the thought from the receivers head so I wonder how many players “blocked me” because they really believed the letter sent out about me, as apparently my EWB buddy did? And how many players will block the person on the new spam chain letter?
And lastly, since I don’t know the player named in the spam chain letter, I wonder if they are aware that someone sent out this chain letter about them? And should I at least let them know that someone sent this out? And if they request a copy should I forward it to them since seeing is believing?
Thank You Nettie,
The Moving Finger Writes
| Dear The Moving Finger Writes,
Wow! Every time I think I’ve heard it all, I get something new! How horribly upsetting that your name is on a chain! Unfortunately, once you’re name has made it on to a chain letter there’s no way of removing it. Hopefully the chain will die a quick and painless end and nobody will ever see it. In extremely rare cases, Pogo will fulfill a name change request when a situation warrants it. This is definitely one of those cases. I have contacted you to arrange for this, and you have provided me with a new name and this change has been made. So, even if this particular chain does make its way to thousands of in-boxes, that name is no longer connected to a real person. For the record, you can’t “hack” anyone through the Friends List on Pogo! In regards to what you said to start this “chain” of events, so to speak, I must say you have a great sense of humor. It’s unfortunate that some players take the game so seriously that they would go to such lengths over such a remark. |
Good day Ms. Netiquette!
This question is more of a what should I do question. See, I have this friend on Pogo who I wouldn’t trade for the world. She means everything to me. She is always so happy and sweet and kind to everyone.
Lately she has gotten attached to a special someone who is on Pogo. When I met him, I was impressed with how humble and kind he was. I felt happy for her; she was so happy. But a couple days ago, he had an infection in his brain and fell into a deep coma. My dear friend was crushed. Her chat went from having proper grammar to boring with no punctuation -like she was chatting in mono. She told me she wanted to kill herself because of how depressed she was. I was sickened to be honest. I hate to see my friends, anyone for that matter, so depressed.
What should I do, Nettie? She brings me down real fast when I chat with her.
She makes ME depressed after a matter of 5 minutes. I don’t know if I can take it. I always defended her and got her out of trouble with other guys on here. But I never dealt with depression.
Please help me Nettie.
Unsure What to Do
| Dear Unsure What to Do,
You are in a tough place. You have a friend who is suffering right now and for all your efforts, you can’t help her. You have been a wonderful friend to her by listening, but it sounds like these conversations are going nowhere and she’s wallowing in despair. And it’s likely there is very little that you can actually do to help her, aside from listening, which you’ve you’ve done a lot of lately to no avail. It sounds like she does need to talk to someone, but that someone can’t be you. She really needs to talk to a professional or perhaps some sort of support group. And all you can do is encourage her to seek some sort of help. Perhaps, the next time you get into a conversation with her and she begins to get into it, and you see there’s no end to her grief, you might try telling her something like “I’m sorry for your troubles, and I know I can’t help, but I encourage you to discuss them with a counselor or therapist or someone trained to help.” It could be exactly what she needs to hear. It could also be something she doesn’t want to hear, so be prepared for a less-than gracious response as well. Either way, you come to Pogo to play, and you have done the best you can with her. Your letter indicates you need your space, and this situation is putting a damper on your Pogo experience. So, you may need to tell her that your time is limited and that you need a little it to yourself. Next, you might want to edit your Blocked Player’s List and you can add her name so that she’s unable to locate you while you’re on Pogo. Yes, she could “happen” to enter the same room that you’re in, but that’s unlikely. Now, I know that some folks will write and admonish me for suggesting that you “bail” on a friend in need, but let me be clear – that is not at all what I’m suggesting you do. You do both yourself and her a greater service by suggesting she help herself than by letting her stew in her grief. |
Dear Ms. Netiquette,
I was reading a few of your letters on people reporting others.
What happens if a player reports someone that didn’t do anything wrong and are just doing it out of spite? What does Pogo do to the player who was reported? Are they banned for life, and how do they know who is telling the truth?
Questioning the Process
| Dear Questioning the Process,
With every abuse report, a snippet of chat is included so that our representatives can make a judgment on whether or not there was a violation of our Terms of Service. Many received abuse reports are deemed invalid and no action takes place. In cases where someone makes a series of false reports, that person may find his or her account in trouble. Pogo is only interested in whether or not any Terms of Service violations took place. If two reports come in from two players accusing each other of abuse, our representatives can tell by the chat snippet if any violation actually occurred. If so, the account is handled appropriate to the violation. If not, no action is taken and the abuse reports are considered handled. |
